Being Me
Nicholas Urbaniak • February 7, 2025

I gazed at my reflection,
Searching for who I might become—
A thousand roads before me,
And I chose to follow some.
In that chasing of illusions,
I almost lost my way,
Wishing for a different face
To greet me every day.
Yet in the quiet hours,
A gentle truth appeared:
All I ever needed
Was already here.
“To wish I was other, if only it could be.
Oh no! Now, I am fine with being me.”
Those words lit a spark within me,
A flame I never knew,
They whispered I am enough
In all I seek to do.
No longer seeking elsewhere
For the person I should be,
I stand in self-acceptance—
Complete, and truly free.
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There are days when nothing makes sense. You try. You show up. You give your heart, your time, your attention. And still — nothing sticks. Nothing moves. Nothing reflects back what you hoped. Instead of momentum, you get static. Instead of appreciation, silence. You pour into things, into people, into ideas… and somehow feel more empty than full. And slowly, something inside you starts to break. It’s not dramatic. It’s quiet. A quiet cracking of belief. Belief that the world will reward your effort. Belief that kindness comes back around. Belief that if you keep doing the right thing, something will click. But sometimes, it doesn’t. And you’re left there — not with a revelation, but with a weight. A tiredness that no nap or quote or breathwork can fix. And here’s the truth: You’ve been giving everything away hoping someone would give something back. But now, there’s nothing left to give. And no one’s giving back. So maybe it’s time to stop. Not forever. Not dramatically. Just… for you. Stop waiting. Stop bleeding for things that don’t hold you in return. Stop trying to earn peace from a world that profits off your unrest. This isn’t giving up. This is self-rescue. You don’t need to be more useful, more available, more inspiring. You just need to be yours again. And that starts with something simple, but life-altering: “I see you. I won’t leave you again.” Because maybe the person you’ve been waiting to show up for you — was always going to be you. The one who stays. The one who protects your peace. The one who finally chooses you, without apology.